A 20- something femme studying at a liberal arts college and navigating friendships, relationships, allyship, feminism, queerness, anxiety and survival. I like flowers and cute animals, especially pigs. White/ cis/ able-bodied. She, her.
If you need anything specific tagged, I will do it no questions asked. Just PM me. Will answer asks publicly unless told to answer privately.
Sometimes I get really weirded out that we have pictures that have my abuser(s) in them hanging around the house.
Friend without PTSD 1: I almost fell asleep at the beginning.
Friend without PTSD 2: Same at the end.
Me and other friend with PTSD: Well, I'm going to be on edge for the next few hours.
There exists a sub-section of men who literally cannot sit through a discussion of structural misogyny without receiving constant and emphatic reassurance that no one is accusing them personally of being a misogynist. This is a derail and an attempt to shut down debate. Because, to quote “Sometimes, it’s just a cigar”:
“Suppose you disagree with women about whether rape is part of the structure of our society, used to reinforce patriarchy. Do you make that debate possible by standing on your wounded pride, and just insisting that the debate must start with a disclaimer that says you’re not a rapist? Forgive me, but that’s nothing more than narcissism.”
The conviction that you have never participated or been complicit in structural misogyny is dubious to say the least, no matter what your gender. But even if you are resolute that you, personally, have managed to transcend the system you were born and raised in and now stand as a shining beacon of gender equity outside the mire of patriarchy? Good for you, but structural misogyny still exists and we still need to have a conversation about it. If you think you have nothing to learn, go play elsewhere on the internet.